BUILD, DON'T DESTROY.

The truth is we are emotional. We love hard. We get upset. We go off. And on top of that some of us are good at scenes - making them. Yeah, those are hard truths. But it’s also true that 99% of the time this scene is an overwhelming emotional outbreak that points back to just one very simple fact - we’re hurt. And we’re mad that we’re hurt. The reality is this is not effective no matter how you look at it. And it doesn’t solve the real problem upsetting us. With maturity and reason we must learn to recognize our pain and prepare a response to keep ourselves composed. We must control ourselves. Doing so means learning to calm ourselves and speak when you can express yourself well. We’ve all been here. And hopefully we recognized that this isn’t effective and even more it’s not a good expression of what it is you really feel or even want to say. We have to choose our words and actions wisely. The effects of them last far longer than any tantrum ever will. Prepare yourself with a response for disappointment that doesn’t destroy. The distant you sense between you & your spouse is often a gulf of rubble that has been made from acts like this and is growing because of these type of harmful, damaging outbreaks. Build. Don’t destroy. #firstwivesclub